Hidden emotions

“Ere long, I had reason to congratulate myself on the course of wholesome discipline to which I had thus forced my feelings to submit. Thanks to it, I was able to meet subsequent occurrences with a decent calm; which had they found me unprepared, I should probably have been unequal to maintain, even eternally”(164)

Here Jane has acquired the ability to hide her feelings from others. She says that if her employers found her incapable of doing the job, they hired her for, she wouldn’t have been able to handle it; she might burst out into tears right there on the spot. Harsh criticism isn't something that's easy to take; it really brings you down. Jane says that in order for her to be able to be a successful governess, she must mask her emotions from others; she must hide her confusion and insecurity because if people were to see this side of her, they are less likely to take her seriously, and less likely to hire her.

Certain emotions can be a sign of weakness, and those must be thrown away and locked in the closet so that no one can see them; vulnerability is unacceptable in the business world and is often labeled as unstable. As an employer, he's less likely to hire someone if they have uncontrollable mood swings. One second they’re happy, the next angry, and then sad. It can get very tiresome and get in the way of a job. The employee is less likely to be effective if she is too busy dealing with her emotions.

The sad truth is that as much as we fight it, people are usually quick to judge others; if someone’s emotions are just leaking through his or her body, you are going to judge them based on those emotions. If you want people to see you as a strong, stable and reliable person, then you wouldn’t want people watching you as you are crying, because it takes away from the strong, stable persona you are aiming for.

I’ve had experiences like this throughout my entire lifetime. I hide my emotions from the people around me; in fact, I do it most of the time. I'm not nor ever have been comfortable showing my feelings to to others, and I have a hard time doing it. Typically I try to hide my weaker side; I try to hide the emotions that are characteristic of a weak, unreliable person. I try to mask what I am ashamed of and show others what I want them to see. Although I do it all the time, I will admit it is not the best thing to do. I have found that the more I try to hide my emotions, the more seclusive I am, and while it is not a good thing to do, I sometimes feel like it's what society expects of me as a male; society expects me to hide my emotions. Thats why I connect with this quote, because Jane has also becomes emotionally reticent, but she's congratulating herself on it, and I guess in a sense I do it too; otherwise I would cease to hide my emotions.